Impressing The Boss' Wife: Workplace Advice For Dealing With Someone You Don't Ever Work With

(Monday, August 16, 2004) - Sometimes, the most intimidating woman in the workplace doesn't even work there: She's the boss' wife. While you may only see her occasionally - at the company holiday party perhaps, or dropping by for lunch, she usually has the CEO's ear and is one of his closest professional advisers.

"Impressing the CEO's wife is sometimes more important than impressing the CEO himself," says Peter Handal, president and CEO of Dale Carnegie Training in New York. "Many times, she can sway his opinion of an employee."

While she's not on payroll, her opinions can impact your role at the company. Also, her own behavior can impact your opinion of your company's leader. "Teresa Heinz Kerry is one current example of this," says Handal. While she is not running for office herself, there's no doubt she expresses her opinions on any number of topics to her husband, Senator John Kerry, and that he listens. "I don't want to paint a Machiavellian portrait," says Handal, but for many male corporate leaders, "their spouses are their most trusted confidantes - at work and at home."

The opinions of the CEO's wife may range from commenting on your etiquette to your personal style -- be it your haircut, clothes or bad breath. "Ultimately, every impression you make in the workplace matters, even if it's to someone you don't work with," says Handal.

Some advice:

Intelligence gathering. Make sure you know who the boss' wife is - even if you've never met or seen her. Ask your co-workers questions - Have you ever met her? Does she visit the office often? Be ready.

Always mind your manners in the workplace - especially with unfamiliar faces. "Office security issues aside," says Handal, "if you see an unfamiliar face in the workplace, smile and acknowledge them. You never know who they might be: an important client perhaps, or the president's wife or family member." Company parties are a similar issue - employees need to remember that despite the pretense of a celebration, a company gathering, even with cocktails, is still a professional setting.

Don't get too familiar with the boss' family members. Respect personal boundaries in the workplace, and don't become too chummy with the boss' family. While you will build close relationships with your co-workers, the dynamic of interacting socially with your boss and his family is delicate. It's always better to maintain some distance while still being approachable and warm.



About Dale Carnegie Training
Dale Carnegie Training (www.dalecarnegie.com) is a global management training company with experts in corporate management, workplace issues and leadership trends. The company provides leadership, sales and management training to over 400 of the Fortune 500 companies, training over 6 million adults worldwide.

View all Dale Carnegie Training Press Releases

This article has been read 207 times.

Printer Friendly